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| We all thought he was phoning home. No. He's actually programming his flat screen. |
Oh those good old days. Simple days when you raced home from school, kicked off your shoes, did homework, gobbled down that dinner, jumped in the tub and then eagerly plopped down in the family room to jostle with pesky siblings for the best spot to...watch TV. The anticipation itself was almost as enjoyable as those beloved opening show tunes. And not just anything but *the show* you loved...and it was going to be on at a certain time, day and only ONE time before you had to *GASP* ...wait until next week's episode. Oh the glory to wonder what it all meant and what would happen next week? Would Blair finally go out with her crush? Would Fonzie get kicked out of school? And of course, who shot JR?
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| No one cared back then how close you sat to the screen. |
After our exciting evening, well we'd have to wait for a while, sometimes a whole season of wondering through afternoons spent staring up at ceiling walls while our lava lamps spun out hazy blobs of contemplation. Sweet torture. Ah, those days, those memories....
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| The Art of TV Contemplation |
Wake up, people, and join the 21st century American TV market. In my experience so far being back home in the states, a chat about TV is basically this:
Person 1: I'm going to watch some TV. Want to?
Person 2: Sure. Pull up the DVR list
Person 1: Ok.
No more "what's on tonight? what time is it?" or the like. Far less "it's Sunday, so that means Show X is on" or, "oh, I need to wrap up this call since Season 1 is starting in a few minutes..." Yawn. Archaic statements of the past and/or habits of the outdated and outmoded. Time is not the only one waiting for no one. Seems TV is out the gate also.
Over the last 10 years, I've not had a TV except for when in Kenya, and I can tell you that was a sight to see. As a former TV editor, I love video, pictures, images and moving media; working at a cable station was a dream job - hello paycheck related to watching multiple screens! Fast forward to being in Nairobi, and having not just a tv but one with a DVD player and a video rental place down the road ( aww isn't that sweet, a place that rents movies. Cute!). We are talking watching 5-6-7 episodes of LOST, Big Love and Lipstick Jungle with breaks only for nature and nutella. Remote(s) in one hand, beverage in the other. Full stop.
So you can imagine it was a bit of a shock to recently re-enter the TV/ Digital/Cable/DVR landscape ( I have no idea what that means, actually, but it sounds good.). To switch on one of my brothers' TWO big flat screens - that are mounted ON THE WALLS - and absorb the fact that there are about 500 channels to scroll through (once I can find the correct scroll button, of course)..well words fail me. When glued in front of such a screen, all I see is Verizon on my horizon.
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| You say Hulu, I say Hawaii |
To be clear, lots of these explosive channel options and hanging TVs are available in the places I've been, and in many ways are even more advanced that some options in certain parts of the states. Sort of like how the cell reception overseas out runs many coverage areas in the states, as some countries simply ignored dealing with shoddy landlines and went straight to mobile technology. I take full responsibility for my elementary level of TV genius, and like the classic break up line goes: It's not you, it's me. Being in Asia was like being in the wild west of the technology frontier with the cowboys and cowgirls swinging not lassos but cable lines.
So what does it mean, then, today, to watch tv? It seems to mean whatever you want it to mean, whenever you want. Customization, baby. You can still be all old school and "appointment view" meaning you do something as basic as plan to watch a show at a certain time on a certain day. Or you DVR it (I guess that's a verb now) and watch it whenever, which could be never based on some friends I know who never get to their lists. It could mean flipping open your laptop --ha! I just dated myself again, due to the prevalence of tablets! --and watch online. Identifying the number of options is like asking the length of the horizon.
But honestly, there's a new thing I have yet to get -- Google Chrome can now plug something into something somewhere and you are then connected. To what exactly I'm not sure, but here's what I do know for sure: I bet any random 12 year old on the street could explain it.
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| Is that a new Rubiks Cube? |
